The Heart Of It | Introverts


Being an introvert is a topic I know I've touched on, but I wanted to express a little bit more through a coffee talk post! The discussion between introverts and extroverts had me thinking a lot and how it plays out in a persons life. This topic is so close to heart because I am an introvert. For a very long time I was never content with being an introvert, and in fact I tried very hard to be more like an extrovert. Well until I realized I couldn't be. I'm not very out-going, I feel uncomfortable around a crowd of people I haven't meet before, and I enjoy me-time! A few bloggers were also bringing up this topic along with sharing a few of their stories and how being an introvert has impacted their life. With reading everyone's stories, I wanted to learn more about the life of an extrovert and introvert, hoping it would help me!

In our society I feel like being an introvert is such a bad thing. It's wrong to not want to socialize and spend your weekends away from home and being out with friends. Having alone time is lame, and not being able to post a photo with five other friends is just sad. This message has constantly been shoved in my face, and I got tired of it very fast. I think it's sad that people cannot accept the fact that people like alone time. A time to re-charge and relax. Or even respect the fact that people are introverts instead of discouraging it. I've been told that being an introvert is a trait that should be worked on, and fixed. That it's a bad habit and something that isn't always valued. How will you make friends? How can you get out and know what the world is like? How will you be able to handle certain situations if you don't like people?

Well I hate to burst your bubble people but just because someone is an introvert doesn't mean that they don't like people, or they won't know how to socialize. Introverts know how to be just as outgoing as extroverts the only difference is that introverts prefer to associate with their own crowd, whereas extroverts will find any group and start talking. In fact being an introvert is nothing to be ashamed of, and I had to learn that the hard way! Introverts hold unique and beautiful qualities like being wonderful listeners, express true sympathy, and have deep relationships with close friends. We tend to reach out to those who are sitting alone, or the ones nobody thinks is cool. Instead of having 20 so-so friends, we are perfectly content with 3 solid friends.

Thankfully I was able to pick up a couple of books that have really helped me through this emotional and confusing journey. Introverts in the Church by Adam S. Mchugh is a book that teaches people how to find their place in an extroverted culture. I'm almost finished reading the book and I love everything he has to say. It's been so healing to read and it has definitely made me see a completely different side to what it truly means to be an introvert and an extrovert. I highly recommend the book Quiet by Susan Cain as well. I loved all the statistics and information Cain gave me, but I found it to be overwhelming and a little mind boggling. Therefore I only read the first few chapters before returning it to the library. Cain definitely took a different approach to the topic which I liked very much, but I enjoyed the Christian aspect of Mchugh's book! I didn't find it helpful for my lifestyle for the more secular aspect Cain wrote about, but I did find a her personal story to be a good resource for me, and her little tips here + there were great. I loved the fact that Mchugh's book is all about how to embrace being an introvert in the church. Using all the abilities us introverts have compared to extroverts and using those gifts in the church body.

Extrovert or introvert, either one is not terrible or better than the other. Each has their own unique and powerful qualities that I think everyone needs. It could be boring to just have introverts in the world, and it would be too crazy with just extroverts in the world. We need both. Both can be useful and greatly appreciated. Even introverts can be extroverts and vise versa. I like to call myself an "extroverted introvert," because I am very loud and outgoing among my own group, but would rather re-charge alone. I love sitting in a quiet coffee shop. I enjoy reading a good book all cuddled up in my bed. I'm not fond of dance parties, or group events. I like my own friends, and peaceful atmosphere's. And I'm okay with that! I'm so glad that I was able to find such helpful resources through that time of figuring everything out! Without them I think I'd still be uneasy about the whole thing. Thankfully I've completely accepted the fact that I'm an introvert, but I confess at times I still have to remind myself that it's not such a bad thing. There are still areas in my life that could use a little change, but it's all apart of the journey!


  1. As an extrovert, I found this post really insightful. :) I've been shocked to discover that many of my close friends are introverts, because when we're together they have so much to say and so are fun to be around. They really don't seem so different from me, other than that they insist on their alone time and seem to gravitate towards smaller crowds. Like you said, both are great, and I'm glad you've learned to accept who you are. :)

  2. Fantastic post, Jenna! Definitely worth the read everyone:)
    This is a topic that I haven't thought about in a while, or not too far in depth, really made me think, so thank you!
    Like you, I feel like I am both, extrovert in some areas, while being an introvert in others:)

  3. Loved this post and I can relate so very much! Thank you for this- I've felt this way so many times before. I have felt like people have tried to change me because of my introvertedness and it's nice to hear some good things about it! Thanks Jenna :)

  4. great post, this helped me alot because I am the same and people are sometimes judging.
    great blog, very inspiring
    check out my blog too maybe we can inspire eachother? or follow, let me know and I will follow back :)



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